8 miles easy / 1:15 / 9:22 avg pace
I’m all about honesty on RTLR so I must confess to a (long-term) case of bikini-phobia. I know I’m in the majority here; very few women love to shop for and parade around in bikinis (or one-pieces, tankinis, etc.). I rarely (if ever) remove my cover-up at the beach. I feel exposed and fearful that people are looking at me. And shopping for a bikini is a complete nightmare – those mirrors and lighting should be banned.
I know my phobia is completely irrational. I don’t look that bad. But my hyper-critical self sees a flabby-this or an untoned-that . Funny thing is, when I’m people-watching at the shore (fun!), 90% of the people walk by unnoticed. The other 10% are noticed by everyone! You know, the women and men with the bathing suit that is completely inappropriate for their size. Yup, those people. But let’s get back to the other 90% that pass by unnoticed – every single one of them has a flabby-this or an untoned-that. So why do they go by unnoticed and I give myself the hardest time?
One of the gifts running has given me (bear with me, I’m going somewhere with this) is complete appreciation of my body. I’m very thankful and grateful that I can push my body so hard and it still gives me results. It really amazes me sometimes…my legs especially. They are strong and powerful and have carried me through 8 marathons. So after many, many years of running I’m learning to accept and appreciate my body for what it is: strong, powerful, and resilient.
The point of this post is not to elicit encouraging comments. I’m just being honest and transparent. Many of the healthy living bloggers I follow will post pictures of themselves on vacation in a bikini. They have it right (and look fabulous too). Healthy eating coupled with exercise should translate to bikini confidence. And while I’m not there yet, I’m pretty damn close.
My bikini-phobia is slowly being conquered! On Memorial Day weekend, I went sans cover-up at the pool. And I just ordered 2 bikinis online. Usually I only own 1 bikini since there was never really a need for another one. The strength training class I took on Tuesday also has a duel purpose: besides helping me become a better runner, toning up will help my bikini-confidence. Winning!
Do you suffer from bikini-phobia?